I met “Elizabeth” this morning. Of course, I didn’t meet her at prescription strength. Yikes! I was a bit nervous about meeting her but it seems to have worked out okay… full clean from the floor at 70#… and pushups (on knees… working on it!) instead of ring dips. Breathing was my biggest issue. I was trying to take in a breath from the dead lift position before I dropped down to the floor to begin the clean, and letting my breath out when I was finished. Sometimes it worked out. Mostly, I was all out of whack. Regardless, I think I handled my own with Miss Elizabeth. Our meeting lasted 9:27 minutes. Next time, I’ll go for at least 80# and see what happens.
I’ve been thinking a lot more about my eating. I’ll be honest, it was the binge week from hell. Despite my best intentions, I was unable to survive the 60 cupcakes I brought in for two classes for the twins’ birthday… the 60 various full-sized candy bars I bought as party favors… and the GIANT full-sheet Angry Birds cake for the massive double party at the bowling center. It was out of control and shameful. I’m sure the stress of 25+ kids and 25+ parents in the crazy chaos of the bowling ally didn’t help matters.
Using my best therapeutic techniques, I decided yesterday to pick up the pieces right where I was and move forward. I’ll be honest, I didn’t expect day 1 to be so hard. Maybe it *wasn’t* all that hard and the worst is yet to come, but after a week of binging with the best of them, it was hard. The carb cravings hit in the afternoon. I’m thankful for Vitamin D, chocolate peppermint tea (which really is paleo friendly) and Sleepytime Extra tea, with Valerian. I also made it a point to go upstairs at 7:30pm and not come back down. If that was Day 1, I’m loathe to experience the rest of week one.
Today, I made a double batch of Tomato Soup, which I love and I think it’s Paleo friendly. I’m not trying to go all out Paleo here, but I am trying to reduce my carbs, help my sugar cravings, and see some changes on the scale. I also threw in the makings of Veggie and Beef Soup in the crock pot for dinner. We’re expecting snow tomorrow and for me, that means soups and chilis are on tap. Thinking tomorrow I’ll do a beanless chili. I love the beans but I’m in the minority in my family. Most of the Men/boys want nothing but meat. For someone who has lived most of her life on the edge of vegetarianism… well… ick!
I’m getting close to the 4 month mark, which means another set of stats, pictures, etc. I can tell you that after the past week, I’m dreading it. Last week’s mistake of getting of the scale and seeing a pound gain, coupled with a friend who recently lost 17 pounds in just a few short weeks, has left me reeling… especially since after three full months of Crossfit, I’ve only got 10 pounds to show for it.
Oh, sure, we can talk about the clothes… which are getting looser everywhere BUT the waist, which means I haven’t dropped a single size. Oh sure, we can talk about the five inches I’ve lost in my waist, which baffles me because the tape measure doesn’t lie and the waist on my pants doesn’t lie… but the two are NOT matching up! My waist is a little looser, but for 5 freaking inches, I expected more.
My plan… to stay the course. I love Crossfit. It *feels* right. It’s a perfect fit for me, even with the pressure I feel to “not get too big” from my family, so much pressure that I’ve only given some family members a very vague sense of what I’m actually doing, and have never mentioned the word “Crossfit.” But… that’s another post!
The rest of my plan is to focus on my eating and work on these sugar cravings, that seem unbeatable at the moment. It’s only Day 2 and people are telling me it doesn’t get better until Day 8. Frankly, I don’t know if I can make it that long. Hey… I’m all for honesty here. I won’t sugar coat it… haha! I’m going to try and I’m going to try very, very hard. I’ll let you know…