My Mind Keeps Playing Tricks On Me

And it’s driving me flipping crazy! One day, I’ll look in the mirror and I swear my chin is a little smaller. The next day, I’ll catch sight of my face in a new photo and I can’t believe how BIG my chin is. Same chin… 24 hours apart… and I go from thinking I’m making all of this progress to feeling like a big, fat (literally) failure. It happened again today. I put my jeans on right out of the dryer and they weren’t tight at all. They fit perfectly. I felt wonderful. 8 hours later, I saw two pictures of me, taken today, and all I could see was this great big, giant double chin. Have I made ANY progress at all??? Shave off my hair and I look exactly like my father… which is fine if you are a big strapping retired police officer… not so great for a middle-aged, frumpy Mom of five. 

So, I’m on vacation this week… here:

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And I don’t have full control over my food. I’m doing okay, but in no way have I been 100% Paleo. The two meals a day I do have control over have been Paleo, the third… eh… sometimes yes, sometimes not so much… nothing blatant until today’s Dixie Stampede dinner theater. 

One thing that SHOCKED me… the cravings have returned, which is probably why I wasn’t on top of my game at the dinner theater this afternoon. Last night was awful. I finally figured out what it was that I’m missing… fat! I would have killed for an avocado! I settled for 90% dark chocolate and carrots dipped in freshly ground almond butter. Frankly, at this point, I don’t know what the heck to do. I’m so new at this that travelling and doing Paleo is still hard. We leave tomorrow and I can tell you that as much as I love going on vacations, I will be thrilled to be back home and fully in control of my environment and exercise. I miss Crossfit!!! I miss the people who keep me going and I miss the coaches who push me to do more and lift more and do it all faster! 

I have five months until my next vacation. Hopefully, I’ll be better prepared and have more of a solid Paleo footing under me. I’m still trying… and perhaps for this perfectionistic all or nothing chick, that’s pretty good. 

🙂

 

 

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